Tempered to Perfection by God's Hands

         There is so much I could write on the subject of my heart and the trails, fears and anticipation that have plagued my very soul, spirit and mind. I could go into detail of the hopeless despair that clung to my heart. I could tell you of the fears which wrapped themselves and imprinted in my mind horrors and tore at my heart. I could paint such a picture that you could imagine the anticipation that oppressed me and stripped me of the calm peace which Jesus had given to me. But why would I choose to dwell upon the inconsolable afflictions, when my eyes have sought out the heart of Jesus?

     It is true that these past five days have been, in many forms, an abhorrent  nightmare, but even in the darkest hour of this night, I have seen a light, so bright that His angel's breath could be seen. I knew that though I felt terribly alone and desolate in the cold shadows of the dark, I was being embraced and held in the arms of God, while angels surrounded me, armed for war, as body guards of a King would stand ready before the throne. I knew that it was okay to be weak, and to allow Jesus to protect me; my heart, spirit, and soul. It was okay to cry, because I was broken and bruised. As Jesus held me, and still holds me, I saw and continue to see, His hand covering my wounds and healing me from the inside out. It is the beginning of a healing in my heart, and I know it's not going to happen over night, but I know also that through this tribulation that Jesus will not leave me, and He will hold me as He renews my strength and open my eyes to the wonders He has in store for me; my life, my dreams and inmost desires.

    There are mountains and valleys in the horizon, and I can only begin to imagine the journey which is set before my feet. As I have had this time in arms of God, He has begun a healing, but even further more, He has begun to reveal Himself to me deeper and more intimately then I ever dreamed. He has asked and required of me, a time where I turn my eyes from the things my heart loves on this world, and train my sight upon His heart and His eyes. I believe that I am beginning to fall in love with Jesus as a woman would fall for a man.

    I don't know what God has planed for me through all of this but as someone wonderful once said:  "..through these trials we have to go through, my heart will be tempered to perfection by God's Hands."
Only God can do the work in my heart that I crave, and I most certainly crave Jesus in every way; I want to know Him, to become like Him; a reflection of His heart in mine. God is the only one who can do that in me; He is the only one who can perfect, purify, and mold my heart as in-depth as any one could desire. 


     As looked into the mirror this morning, instead of seeing a woman, I saw a child; a simple minded, tender child. I realized how much I still have to learn, and how much maturing God still has to do in my heart, before I am truly a woman who fears, loves and knows the Lord. But it encourages me to see and feel the hand of God on my heart, holding me, loving me, and molding me. 


Perhaps someday my heart will be fully 'tempered to perfection by God's Hands'. Today however, I will focus my eyes and heart on God, and I will look to eyes of Jesus and allow Him to heal me, and mold me, and I will fall in love with Him more everyday durning and exceeding this tribulation at hand.